Last night was the last time I will have cooked him dinner and tomorrow will be the last time I make him his breakfast and brew him a cup of coffee.
I read an article on Mommyish (I think it was there) about how parents often celebrate the firsts: the first tooth, the first step, the first haircut but they never notice the lasts: the last 12 month onsie, the last diaper, the last 2:00 feeding and so forth. It's because, the author wrote, parents are so busy with their lives that they don't notice that something was the last until it's already gone and can never be recorded or even remembered.
It sounds sad, especially when I sit here and think about all the lasts we're going to have together. I'm sure I'm going to make it sound as if this is a final goodbye and while that's not even close, I have no idea how long it will be until I see him again and I was thinking about this article and well, it made me think what are our lasts?
We're going to go out to a nice dinner tonight, just the two of us so, unaware, last night's supper was well, the last supper I was going to cook for him. Tuesday night we'll be in Manchester and Wednesday evening I'll be having pizza with my mom and sister in CA. I made something I've been cooking a lot recently a, because it's easy and b, it's fast. It's oh so yummy though so it's not a bad last meal.
If I had thought about it I'd have prepared steak & ale pie instead. Sorry honey.
Tomorrow I think I'll do something special and make my mother's version of french toast. We have the bread, we have the eggs and I think it'll be a nice little thing. We had that for Christmas breakfast too. He really likes mom's french toast.
I can't say when the last lunch I made for him was since he doesn't usually eat lunch. Tonight will be the last night I sleep in our bed and tomorrow night will be the last night I get to sleep in his arms. Tonight is the last night I'll have the kitties coming onto the bed to sleep with us. And when I fill up their food bowl tomorrow, it'll be for the last time.
Lasts are really depressing and though I'll stop writing about them, I know I won't stop thinking about them, wondering if this will be the last time Timmy lets me give him a kiss.
It's stupid, really, because I'll be back and when I return, it'll be for good; I won't be leaving again until we leave as a family. So this isn't a 'goodbye' but a 'see you in a bit', even if that 'bit' is a year or so.
I read an article on Mommyish (I think it was there) about how parents often celebrate the firsts: the first tooth, the first step, the first haircut but they never notice the lasts: the last 12 month onsie, the last diaper, the last 2:00 feeding and so forth. It's because, the author wrote, parents are so busy with their lives that they don't notice that something was the last until it's already gone and can never be recorded or even remembered.
It sounds sad, especially when I sit here and think about all the lasts we're going to have together. I'm sure I'm going to make it sound as if this is a final goodbye and while that's not even close, I have no idea how long it will be until I see him again and I was thinking about this article and well, it made me think what are our lasts?
We're going to go out to a nice dinner tonight, just the two of us so, unaware, last night's supper was well, the last supper I was going to cook for him. Tuesday night we'll be in Manchester and Wednesday evening I'll be having pizza with my mom and sister in CA. I made something I've been cooking a lot recently a, because it's easy and b, it's fast. It's oh so yummy though so it's not a bad last meal.
If I had thought about it I'd have prepared steak & ale pie instead. Sorry honey.
Tomorrow I think I'll do something special and make my mother's version of french toast. We have the bread, we have the eggs and I think it'll be a nice little thing. We had that for Christmas breakfast too. He really likes mom's french toast.
I can't say when the last lunch I made for him was since he doesn't usually eat lunch. Tonight will be the last night I sleep in our bed and tomorrow night will be the last night I get to sleep in his arms. Tonight is the last night I'll have the kitties coming onto the bed to sleep with us. And when I fill up their food bowl tomorrow, it'll be for the last time.
Lasts are really depressing and though I'll stop writing about them, I know I won't stop thinking about them, wondering if this will be the last time Timmy lets me give him a kiss.
It's stupid, really, because I'll be back and when I return, it'll be for good; I won't be leaving again until we leave as a family. So this isn't a 'goodbye' but a 'see you in a bit', even if that 'bit' is a year or so.
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